How can you do that?

Most Rev. John Iffert

Bishop of Covington

Catholics Embracing All God’s Children (CEAGC) is a support group for parents and family members of gay, lesbian and transgender people. A local group, they are nurtured by and affiliated with a Lexington based group called Fortunate Families. After meeting with members of CEAGC on two prior occasions, I accepted an invitation to celebrate Mass with members of the group and their neighbors at St. Joseph Parish in Cold Spring on the Memorial of St. Augustine. That decision caused some to ask of me, “How can you do that?”

People ask the question naturally enough because the Catholic Church embraces the Scriptural foundations of sexuality and marriage. To be moral, every sexual act is to be both unitive (contributing to a permanent communion of life and love between spouses) and procreative (open to the creation of new human life). God created men and women in a way that complement one another, and their union leads to the continuation of the human family.

In this moral framework, homosexual acts — like every sexual act outside of marriage, and any sexual act between spouses that separates the unitive and procreative dimensions of sexuality — are grave matter for sin. If freely chosen and embraced, such acts can be an obstacle to our salvation. The Church, therefore, calls all her children to be chaste. Those who are married are to be monogamous within marriage, as a sign of God’s own faithfulness to God’s people. The rest of us are called to abstain from sex all together. In recognizing that adults can have a meaningful and fully human life without being sexually active, the Church is an almost unique and clarion voice in our society.

So then, how? First, the Church firmly asserts that all individuals, without regard to orientation, must be accepted with “respect, compassion and sensitivity” (Catechism of the Catholic Church, 2358). Pope Francis teaches, “The Church makes her own the attitude of the Lord Jesus, who offers his boundless love to each person without exception” (Amoris Laetitia, 250). This is to be the attitude of the Church’s ministers and all faithful Catholics. The principle is rooted in the belief that every person is made in the image of God and possesses inherent dignity.

The Church especially recognizes the complexities faced by families whose members identify as gay, lesbian or transgender. “Such families should be given respectful pastoral guidance, so that those who manifest a homosexual orientation can receive the assistance they need to understand and fully carry out God’s will in their lives” (AL, 250). This is precisely what I hoped to accomplish by offering this Mass with and for these CEAGC families and their neighbors.

Finally, the Church distinguishes between homosexual orientation and homosexual acts. As mentioned above, our attractions and urges do not define us. Before all else, we are children of God. We should look to our relationship with Christ in the Holy Spirit for our purpose and fulfillment.

Nevertheless, some of our brothers and sisters have an exclusive attraction to people of the same sex, and they experience this as an important aspect of who they are. “In so far as the homosexual orientation can lead to sexual activity which excludes openness to the generation of new human life and the essential sexual complementarity of man and woman, it is, in this particular and precise sense only, objectively disordered. However, it must be quite clear that a homosexual orientation must never be considered sinful or evil in itself” (Catholic Bishops Conference of England and Wales, Cherishing Life, 111).

The presumption that our gay or lesbian brothers and sisters are guilty of unconfessed sin that would preclude them from receiving the Eucharist is discriminatory and never just.

I received letters and e-mails from about two dozen people urging me not to celebrate Mass with CEAGC. I took each one seriously and investigated each complaint about the group or Fortunate Families. In each case, I judged that the complainant failed to make this distinction between orientation and action, presumed sin that was not in evidence, or failed to make the distinction between supporting persons and endorsing an advocacy agenda. I am happy to report that the liturgy on the Memorial of St. Augustine was a solemn, joyous and prayerful moment. The Church was full. The ministries of hospitality, acolyte, word and music were beautifully and respectfully carried out. I recognized most of those in attendance. They are people who regularly attend our parishes and receive Holy Communion faithfully. I was especially impressed by the number of parents who were grateful that they and their children were welcomed by the Church with respect and warmth.

I called all present to remain prayerfully and studiously open to the teaching of the Church about sexuality and marriage. I also encouraged the congregation with a story of a gay man who once witnessed to me his great love for Christ and the Church. That witness had a lasting effect on my life. I invited all to be living witnesses to others. The full text of my homily is available at www.covdio.org.

Although I was glad to pray with this community and appreciated their invitation to walk with them, I was disturbed that such a simple and natural pastoral response resulted in conflict in this local Church. I asked all present to pray in love for one another, that God bring out of this moment a greater understanding of what the Church teaches and the divine gift of peace and unity. It remains my prayer.

Peace to you and to all who seek the truth with sincerity of heart.